I’m turning 45 next week. I know, I know. I don’t look a day over 38. At least if I’m wearing my tinted moisturizer and you don’t get too close. And I’ve recently dyed my hair.
So back off. Thanks.
I’m not a terribly sentimental person, until I am. And birthdays seem to bring this out in me. More so than New Year’s Eve or Yom Kippur, my birthday makes me take a look around, glance at the past and try to see in to the future. And come up with a plan. I always have a plan.
Looking back over the last year, this is what I see: another year of better than average parenting, of better than good professional achievements and an increase in the intensity of my sex life. Take that peri-menopausal symptoms.
And when I’m done looking back and take a few minutes to look around and live in the present (which is how I should live more often), this is what I see: I have a cleaning lady again after an 8 month hiatus, I’m going on a birthday cruise with 6 of my closest friends, my kids are healthy and mostly happy except when I get mad at them and my husband loves me for who I am. And the feeling is mutual.
Ok, now for the hard part: the future. I know that you can’t really plan for the future but you sure as hell can outline it. So here’s my outline for the future, and by future, I mean the near future, one year out.
  • Be better. At everything. Because there’s always room for improvement. A better parent, wife, writer and friend.
  • Set some far-out wacky goals for myself because I think I’ve been setting mine too low. Challenge myself. Write my book, make health and wellness a priority and don’t forget about my family and friends. 
  • Live in the present. This is by far the hardest thing for me. Sure I’m better at it than I was 5 years ago. But it’s hard for my mind-never-stops, semi-neurotic brain. I mean right now, I’m already thinking about next week, when I get back from my trip. And I haven’t even gone yet. Stop it. 
  • Try to achieve some balance in my life. A little bit of work here, some exercise there and throw in a bit of planned spontaneity. It’s the only kind of spontaneity that I know how to have.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go pack for my trip, tuck my kids in to bed, have a quickie with my husband, run around the block 4 times, finish up 3 blog posts and go to bed. I’ve got a ship to catch in the morning.
Bon voyage.